old haunting (brooke)

Just about every muscle in Joe Astrid's body was twitching with anxiety, screaming at him to go back. It wasn't his first time being in the forest, no, but it certainly was his first time in broad daylight. Anyone could have seen him, he could get in quite a bit of trouble. But the problem was that for Joe's Muggle Studies class, he had to record himself speaking, and Joe wasn't really the most confident of people. The thought of someone barging in on him while he was recording himself made his skin crawl.

His legs carried him to an all-too-familiar place. It wasn't identifiable as a forest clearing; the canopy of trees looming above him had the boy plunged into near darkness, just enough for him to be able to see himself and the camera in his right hand. He shoved his wand up his sleeve, sitting down and placing the camera down on the ground before him, pressing record before he started to ramble.

"How does someone decide where they belong in the world? How does someone know exactly where it is that they fit in and where they don't? It's a problem, I've found, that I constantly finding myself facing. Where do I fit in? With the other muggleborns, with the muggles, with the Hufflepuffs, with the dead?" He finished with a whisper, shaking his head with a miserable sigh before getting rid of what he'd just done.

People will think you're after the sympathy vote, Astrid his inner monologue hissed, and for a second he felt quite bad about it. But it was only then that he realised. "But you do. You want people to feel bad, you want them to care about you. You want them to know that you're damn broken, don't you?" he murmured, bringing his knees to his chest and letting the noises of the forest consume him.

Glancing over her shoulder, she made sure there was no one near or around her. What she was thinking of doing was impulsive and crazy and went against her own moral standards of following the rules, but she needed some time alone. Classes were getting stressful and with the recent addition of a brother to the family, things were piling up on her plate. Of course, she adored Tristan and loved him dearly, but combined with the fact that her OWLs were this year, the added stress of caring for him had taken its toll on her.

Needing to just take some time for herself, to gather her thoughts and just relax, she had decided to head to the one place she knew no one would dare go - the Forbidden Forest. Nervous at breaking a school rule, she kept looking around, checking for people. When she saw nobody, she quickly entered the thickness of the trees. Wandering around, she breathed in the scent of wood and fresh foliage. Her ears suddenly picked up an odd sound nearby, and she followed it, curious. It sounded like a human voice, but surely nobody else would be in the forest!

Her eyes had, by then, adjusted to the darkness that came from the lack of sunlight, filtered out by layers of branches and leaves and she made out the vague shape of a boy a few feet in front of her. Approaching him, she realized that it was a boy she had met in a few classes - Joe, she believed his name was - and fellow prefect.

"But you do. You want people to feel bad, you want them to care about you. You want them to know that you're damn broken, don't you?"

In the quiet and stillness of the forest, she heard those words being spoken, although she was sure he had meant it as a murmured statement to himself. Who doesn't, she thought to herself in reply to his question, but she didn't say anything aloud just then. Purposely stepping on a branch to alert him to her presence, she waited a few seconds before moving to sit beside him, placing a gentle hand on his back.

"Hey, are you okay?" she asked softly.

The boy kept rambling for a few moments, still hugging his knees to his chest. Once or twice, he was convinced that he could hear the indicative "crack" that accompanied a twig snapping beneath someone's feet, but he assured himself that it was probably just one of the many, fascinating creatures that roamed about the forest. He shushed himself anyway, instead taking his wand out from his sleeve and levitating the leaves that had become his cushion over the last year and a bit.

Another branch snapped, and Joe's head whipped around to the source of the noise. That wasn't a creature's snapping of a twig, it was definitely a human. Centaurs tended to break a few in their path due to their number of legs, and anything else... The sounds were different, was his point. The prefect held his breath, praying that it wasn't someone out to get him in trouble, breathing out the greatest sigh of relief when he saw a familiar Gryffindor emerging from the trees before falling back to his tiny, previous position.

The girl came and sat beside him, and once again the boy was more than a little confused. Human contact felt really weird, he decided, but he didn't flinch away from her. It was comforting, kind of, to know that the world was actually real. "Yeah, I'm fine," the boy said softly. No, Joe Astrid wasn't yet a man. He was, at the current moment, a boy, or more the shell of a boy at any rate.

"I was just trying to do the muggle studies homework. Figured out here was the quietest place I could do it." Out of fear of feeling rude, the boy turned his head slightly and looked up at the girl, the ghost of a smile on his lips. "What are you doing out here? Two prefects in the forest? The school's gonna lose it if they find out." The last clause was said with a soft chuckle as he shook his head, hair falling about his face once again like a curtain of sorts.

"Yeah, I'm fine,"

She didn't believe him, shaking her head slightly and sending him a small smile. "Are you really? You don't seem it..." Not wanting to tell him she had overheard him, she stopped there. Folding her legs, she removed her hand from his back and put it on her lap, figuring too long a contact would make him feel awkward.

"I was just trying to do the muggle studies homework. Figured out here was the quietest place I could do it."

"Oh, yes, the recording yourself thing, right?" Her brother had come complaining to her and she spent a whole afternoon assisting him make the video. "Do you need any help?" she asked.

"What are you doing out here? Two prefects in the forest? The school's gonna lose it if they find out."

Giggling, she answered the second - and the easier - question first. "Let's hope they don't find out, then. I promise not to say anything if you don't!" Offering her hand for a shake, she winked playfully at him, grinning.

The first question, she didn't know exactly how to answer. Looking around the quiet abode, she took another deep breath, inhaling the aroma of nature she was beginning to quite enjoy. "Like you said before," she said slowly. "It's a quiet place. It's good for thinking and getting away."

"Are you really? You don't seem it..."

Joe always had been a little transparent when it came to these things. People were always able to see straight through his lies and apparently his attempts at making this slightly less so had been futile. He breathed out a sigh and shook his head at the girl, not wanting to bore her but at the same time really needing someone to talk to about it. If she was going to offer her ears to him, surely the polite thing to do would be to accept? "It's a long story," he said finally, allowing her to ask for expansion if she wanted but not making it mandatory. After all, it really was a rather long story.

The Hufflepuff nodded at her in response to her question, stretching out one leg in an attempt to make himself feel slightly less tiny. "I have a problem in the fact that I'm not exactly an interesting person, so I don't have a clue what to talk about for three minutes." He added a bit of a grin, trying to show some connotation that the sentence was a joke. "I mean, I could ramble about ponies and cupcakes but I don't think that'd be all too interesting."

She offered herself up to help him, then, and Joe wasn't sure how to respond. Of course he would need help if he stood any chance of getting the assignment done, but he didn't know if he really wanted to bother the girl. "It's alright, I'm sure I can... Find something..." He felt horrid for it, he really did, but it was the easiest solution he could think of.

"Let's hope they don't find out, then. I promise not to say anything if you don't!"

He let out another laugh, shaking her outstretched hand. In all honesty, Joe wasn't sure why she was still talking to him, but it was nice. Nice that someone cared enough. "Deal," he said, a hint of actual, genuine happiness in his voice as he returned her playful wink and put his hand back down by his side.

"So, do you come here often then?" he inquired, the playful tone still in his voice. It felt odd; he was doing something he'd seen many other people do before but had never dared do it himself. Funny thing was, Joe didn't even know that he was doing it. Flirting, so they called it, and the ever present monologue in the back of his mind was telling him he really was terrible at it.

"It's a long story."

Taking him in, she nibbled at her bottom lip, wondering what she could say. It was plainly obvious to her that he was hurting - about what, she didn't know - and talking about it always seemed to help people cope. She knew she was lucky enough to have parents she could always go to when she needed to be lent an ear, but that not everybody had such a privilege, and that not everybody needed to talk about it. Choosing her words carefully so that the Hufflepuff would do whatever he needed to, be it share his problems or switch topic, she said, "Well, it's a good thing that nobody will ever find us here, then. We have as long as we like to do whatever we wanted!" She paused, giving him a few seconds to absorb what she had said. "And if you need someone to talk to, I'm here." Giving him another smile, she softly added, "And not just for today, anytime you need it."

"I have a problem in the fact that I'm not exactly an interesting person, so I don't have a clue what to talk about for three minutes."

She imitated his grin, although something told her it wasn't a real one on his face. "You seem rather interesting to me," she said lightly. And it was true; she felt drawn to him, somehow, and really wanted to get to know him better. At the joke about ponies and cupcakes, she laughed, then covered her mouth, realizing she had been too loud. "My brother did his on his family - mainly me - so I'm pretty sure ponies and cupcakes would be way more interesting," she quipped, still chuckling.

"It's alright, I'm sure I can... Find something..."

With a tiny shrug, she replied, "I'm sure you will! But if you find yourself stuck, you can always come find me." His next question made her laugh softly. Shaking her head, she smiled at him. "No, it's my first time. I normally go to the lake or the owlery, but today..." She trialled off. Why did she come here? It wasn't as if those other two places were terribly full. Was it by coincidence that she came to the forest, a place not many other ventured into, the same time as Joe did? She didn't think so. As foolish as it made her sound to most others - which is why she never said anything about it - she believed in fate. "Today I decided differently," she finally concluded, not knowing how else to explain her decision. "How about you?"

"And if you need someone to talk to, I'm here."

No-one had ever said those words to Joe before. They had a strange effect on him. They made his stomach flip and his heart did a weird thing, a weird thing that had never happened before and he wasn't sure whether it was that bad of a thing in the first place. He smiled despite himself, unable to keep it from forming on his lips no matter how hard he tried. "Thank you," he whispered, not trusting himself to do anything but, unaware what his voice would actually do. The softness of the girl's voice was oddly soothing to the boy, and he found his heart finally start to return back to it's regular pace.

Brooke's laugh, the black haired Hufflepuff decided, was one of the most incredible sounds he'd ever heard. It was thick, like honey, but hearty and sweet and he honestly didn't understand why the hell his brain was over-analyzing her laugh of all things, but for one reason or another he couldn't help but want to hear it again just so he could memorise the sound. "Why'd you stop?" the boy asked, his tone matching hers as regards to gentleness. "It was cute." Where'd that come from? the voice in his head asked, for once not ashamed to have to be stuck with the dorky boy.

"Today I decided differently."

"Most definitely not my first time. I like it here, it's quiet, and... Well, the Centaurs are pretty nice. But you didn't hear it from me," he said, still grinning as he placed a finger to his lips. "It's somewhat of a secret hideout, I guess. Damn, the school would absolutely lose it if they knew how many times I'd lied about injuries that came from this place." His wrist was the main one; he didn't know how they'd believed that he'd fallen out of bed and done the damage. Still, he never blamed the staff at this place for having common sense.

Still, it was amazing, he mused, that the day he had needed to run away to lecture himself was the same day he found himself getting to know the only living, breathing person who had cared about him in the last year. It was absolutely amazing.

"Thank you."

He had whispered it, and she smiled to herself. From experience, she knew that sometimes, some things were left unsaid, conveyed through other actions or simpler words, and she felt that this was one such time. Reaching over, she placed her hand over his and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Anytime," she said, repeating her earlier words.

"Why'd you stop?"

Stop?, she asked herself mentally. Stop what? It was only until Joe continued with "It was cute," that she realized what he had been talking about, and she blushed. It was good that she already had freckles, because she could feel even more appearing and she wondered if, in the semi-darkness of the forest, Joe would notice the extra ones coming out. Never before had anyone told her something like that and she felt her something start to take flight in her stomach. Butterflies, she recalled, that's what the feeling was called. All proper reason left her mind and she replied with the only coherent thing she could manage: "That's not the only cute thing."

Startled by her own bravado, she flushed red even more, wondering if this would be a good time to disappear. She was never good at this whole 'guy' business, so why in Merlin's name would a Hufflepuff as nice and as good looking as Joe be interested in her?

But you didn't hear it from me,"

Sending him a wink and dropping her volume to a conspiratorial whisper, she said, "Hear what?" As he continued, she focused on her appearance, trying to make it less obvious what she was feeling. Wait till you know him better, she instructed herself; for all you know, he meant that in a friendly way; stop letting your feelings rule your actions. But it was no use, for feelings had always been the thing that kept her going, kept her moving forward, and she could not change her habits.

"You get injured?" she asked, concern tinting her tone. She didn't like seeing people in pain, and hated the whole idea of anyone getting injured.

"That's not the only cute thing."

Those words and the blush on the girl's cheeks combined to make the most wonderful feeling in the boy's heart. Brooke Walters, he decided, was definitely someone worth getting to know, definitely worth all of the skipped heartbeats and flushes to his cheeks. In a million years, he would never have imagined himself with the confidence he was expressing, and yet the girl before him was so completely different to everyone he'd ever met that Joe simply couldn't help it.

But there was that damn wink again, and for the millionth time the Hufflepuff's breath hitched in his throat. He gave a chuckle to the girl, returning her playful gesture and taking the few necessary moments to, once again, calm himself. For the first time in too long, Joe hadn't been happy at all; far from it. He'd struggle through brave faces and silent tears at night, but being alone with the girl before him was something so completely in contrast to how he used to feel.

"You get injured?"

"Well, it's usually stupid things that I bring on myself for being an idiot. Falling out of trees, stumbling over branches. I won't ever claim to be graceful." Joe accompanied this with a shrug; he'd long since given up caring about his lack of ability to remain upright for more than ten minutes, but the worry in her voice was honestly touching. "Never had anything too serious. A few broken bones, mostly just bruises..." He trailed off, not really sure why he had been talking about his injuries so much, but for some reason where this girl was concerned, the boy struggled to shut up.

As was the harsh reality of life, Joe soon began to feel a little bit of a cool chill and despite the lack of light in the clearing anyway, the boy knew that the afternoon would be wearing on. Other would soon start to wonder about the whereabouts of the two, he could feel it, and with a sigh, he turned to face his new companion. "We should start heading back, soon..."

He had returned her wink and she giggled, feeling those butterflies start up again. The answer was provided by her brain; love at first sight, but she refused to believe it. Things like that didn't happen to her. No one had ever shown any interest in her other than as a friend, and she didn't dare to hope that the Hufflepuff prefect could be feeling the same way towards her as she was towards him.

"I won't ever claim to be graceful."

She laughed, shaking her head. "You don't seem like an idiot to me," she commented with a grin. "And I bet anything I'm clumsier than you. Merlin, I once tripped and fell over while walking on a perfectly straight and smooth path!" Chuckling at herself, she unfolded her legs, stretching them out and pulled up the skirt partially to show him the scars just below her knee before replacing the cloth back down.

"Never had anything too serious. A few broken bones, mostly just bruises..."

Nodding seriously, she said, with all trace if humour gone from her voice, "Broken bones are serious! Oh, please be careful. I'd hate to have to visit you in the hospital wing." Having never been good at being serious for long periods of time, she added lightly, "I guess I'll just have to follow you around and act as your personal bodyguard! 'Watch out, Joe', 'there's a branch, Joe', 'step, Joe'." She giggled and nudged him with her shoulder.

"We should start heading back, soon..."

She sighed, knowing he was speaking the truth. "You're right," she said, begrudgingly, not wanting to leave. "We should." But she made no attempt to move, instead doing the exact opposite by leaning back onto her hands and relaxing.

Softly, she added, "I wish we could stay here forever." She left it at that, not having said everything she had wanted to. If only Joe could see into her mind he'd know what she didn't dare to say: that she wanted to stay with him forever, that she didn't care if they got in trouble just as long as they could remain together. Of course, life was not like that and a few moments passed before she forced herself to stand up. Offering him a hand up, she smiled, her mind already wondering when she would next see him.

"You don't seem like an idiot to me."

Well, there's a first, Joe thought to himself, thanking the girl with a smile nonetheless. His expression dropped, though, when he saw the scars beneath the girl's knees. He felt his stomach jump into his mouth and he found it hard to breathe, then, because scars... well, they weren't anything new to him. He blinked a few times and looked back up into her eyes, his heartbeat still erratic. "How did you even do that?" he asked in a whisper, knowing they weren't from where his mind had first gone, but slightly bewildered all the same. Brooke just didn't deserve to feel any pain.

His worry was soon replaced but utmost cheerfulness, though, as the girl before him started to joke about his clumsiness. "If it means we get to spend every day together, I'm down for it," he said, a slightly cheeky tone to his voice as he nudged her back softly, allowing his hair to fall in his face slightly to act as a curtain of sorts, hiding the flush that threatened to be ever more predominant. But most interestingly, he found, was the way that his name didn't sound so horrendous coming from her lips. Joe. It was such an ordinary name, such an average, annoying name, but when she said it... Well, as dumb as he felt for thinking as such, when she said it, he felt better than the average kid he had always considered himself to be.

Brooke made no attempt at getting up, and for a few moments nor did he. The boy didn't want to go, because leaving usually ended up in loneliness, and Joe had suffered far more than his fair share of being alone.

"I wish we could stay here forever."

At almost the same time, the same words tumbled (albeit a lot quieter) from the Hufflepuff's mouth. Fate was what his mother used to talk about when it came to such things. He hoped that the woman who had raised him was right, because put lightly Joe could easily sit with Brooke for hours. He could lose himself in her smile and her eyes and her laugh, oh her laugh... He could spend every waking moment in her presence and not once would he feel anything other than the most fortunate human in the world.

And though he really didn't need help getting up, Joe took her hand and stood, the dance of a thousand fairies ticking his skin at the contact. It was most bizarre, human touch, after so long of being without it. But that was perhaps not why he felt all warm and bubbly inside. No, he felt that way because the girl he had been getting to know was nothing short of wonderful, and she made him feel the exact same way; something few had managed to achieve in his almost seventeen years of life.

The boy knew exactly what he wanted to do. He wanted to ask about seeing her again, perhaps some time in the very near future, but once more did his confidence seem to fail as he stood, still lightly touching her hand, refusing to let go, staring at the ground beneath him. Would you maybe like to go out sometime, Brooke? The nine words were pushing themselves so far forward in his mind that he was amazed he hadn't accidentally blurted them out already. He cleared his throat once, twice, three times and  looked back up and the pure beauty before him. "Brooke?" he asked quietly. "Would it be okay if I could see you again, maybe? In-... In Hogsmeade, or something?"

((OOC: sorry for the long post I got a little bit carried away...))

"How did you even do that?"

With a wave of her hand to dismiss his concerned tone, she said, "I was three, and apparently thought having magic meant I could fly... Jumping off a moving swing proved me wrong." She stopped to laugh. "Most of my scars come from my own attempts at being brave, but luckily my mum's a Healer so everything is taken care off almost immediately." Pausing, she absent mindedly ran her fingers over the scar on her leg, smiling to herself. "I know this sounds weird, but I really like scars. I see them as proof of what I've gone through, what I've survived. You know, even if I had an option of getting rid of them, I honestly don't think I would."

"If it means we get to spend every day together, I'm down for it,"

Not knowing how to respond, she kept silent, knowing that if she were to start talking just then, she would end up saying something that embarrass her, and possibly push him away. Instead, she reached over and pushed back the hair from his face, wanting to see it. "Why would you want to hide that?" She suddenly found herself speaking, and looked away instantly, wondering what was wrong with her. It seemed that her thoughts were not staying where she wanted them, instead being projected aloud. And what was this light-headedness that she felt?

He had accepted her hand and she had pulled him up, the act of touching his bare skin sending jolts of electricity up her arm. She was glad when he didn't immediately let go, not wanting to ever have to depart from this place, and him. He wouldn't look directly at her and she momentarily wondered if something was wrong, but then at the clearing of his throat, she knew - call it intuition, call it a lucky guess, whatever the case, she just knew - what he was going to ask before he did. And when the words came, she giggled at his phrasing, already knowing her answer. "It would be more than okay, Joe," she whispered softly, as though any other volume would ruin the magic of the moment. "I would love to go to Hogsmeade ... or something ... with you."

As Brooke stood there, gazing at the boy before her, she wondered how it was that she was so lucky. Some people spent half their lives looking for someone who loved them back, and she had always thought she would be one of those people who grew old without so much as having dated anyone. And then she had come into the forest, looking for some time alone, and found him, and it struck her that this was a rare moment to cherish. Maybe, finally, it was her turn for a happy ever after.

"Jumping off a moving swing proved me wrong."

Her explanation calmed him significantly, more so than it should have. Sorry, I worry too much he thought about saying, but instead decided to just keep his mouth shut and listen to her. He could do that forever, really. She had such a soothing voice, so much so that she could be insulting him with every word and not once would he feel offended because the way she spoke was melodic to the boy, in a way.

"Why would you want to hide that?"

It took every muscle in his body not to completely melt at her touch as she moved his hair away from his eyes. "I-..." Joe tried to speak, but all that he managed to get out was one syllable, one pathetic little syllable that he knew he would look back at and kick himself for. He had to clear his throat again, for what felt like the eighteenth time, to try and get something viable to leave his lips. "I don't know... I just always do." He was almost in a whisper at this point, not sure why because the creatures didn't come out in the daytime and if anyone from the castle was looking for them, they would have succeeded by now.

It was her acceptance that truely made the whole day, though, he felt. Why would she want to say yes to you? Why would anyone put themselves through th-... wAIT WHAT? In the midst of his brain being just as harsh as ever he heard the words he had only ever dreamt of someone saying to him, let alone the purely exquisite girl who had oh so fortunately stumbled upon him that day.

A sudden wave of confidence enveloped the boy and he gently took her hand once again, raising her hand and pressing his lips to the back of it. What the hell has gotten into you, kid? the monologue asked, and for once, the Hufflepuff was ready to slap the thing right out of him because damnit, Joe Astrid just wanted to be happy, and he'd finally found someone who could to that for him.

"I-..."

Joe had started a sentence and then trailed off, and Brooke had wondered if she had gone too far with her comment. Of course her big mouth just had to go and ruin everything. Now he probably thought she was an idiot. But then he had continued and something in her realized that he was being shy, which just made her stomach do another flip. Why was it that everything he did sent her brain into overload, almost short-circuiting every part of her? "You shouldn't," she replied, also whispering. "There's no need to hide something like that." Merlin knew she was getting braver with each passing moment, and yet, somehow, less and less sure of herself.

The contradictory emotions made perfect sense to her, although she knew that if she ever tried to explain them to other people, they would just probably end up sending her to get checked out by a doctor. Still, she savoured every moment with this boy, conflicting feelings and all.

She was just about to ask him when and where they would meet when he had picked up her hand, and she stared at him, confused. What was he trying to do? But then he had brought it up towards his lips and her eyes grew wider. Her heart was racing, and she no idea how it hadn't exploded out of her chest. Bringing it up, she felt the gentle lips on her hands and a new sense of ecstasy engulfed her in her entirety. She knew that most people preferred a kiss on the lips, but the respect the boy had shown her by keeping it to her hand meant more to her than any other kiss would have.

And in that moment, there was nothing to say, nothing that could be said, and looked at him, letting her eyes say what her voice couldn't. How was it possible to feel so much and not die of happiness? She had heard many love stories before, taking them all with a pinch of salt, but now that she had experience, she realized that they had been underrated. Words could not have described everything, and now that she knew what it was truly like, she never, ever wanted those feelings to leave. Today surely had to be one of the best days of her life.