I Will Try To Fix You (Ben) : Rated PG -13

The aftermath of the battle brought a lot of consequences for Tess. For one thing was the idea that she was on bed rest. It turned out that she had gotten major injuries in the explosion, not really a surprised considering she had been thrown across the room. Some of her bruising had healed, on her face, arms and legs. The brunt of the injuries laid on her back, her head, and her ribs. Her back ached frequently, and she had bandages wrapped around from the tops of her breasts down to her waist, keeping the ribs in place as they healed. Around them, ugly purple and black bruises marked her sides. She had gotten a look at them for the brief moments that she was conscious as they did her wrappings. It hurt, so badly especially with her back.

Her spurts of consciousness came in and out her head hurting every time she was awake for too long. She could only last an hour or two before her eyes would droop and she was out. They said it was her magical core, taking away her energy to try and heal itself. She didn't question it, even though she was getting anxious. The only visiters had been her parents and Mycroft. And she laid there oftentimes wondering why it was only them. Perhaps it was just that reality had occurred and she knew where she stood with everyone.

At the moment, she was resting, she had tried to read the newspaper until her eyes began to sting and she curled up in bed once more. The lights were thankfully dimmed when she had a headache, as if the room was sentient with her emotions and did as asked. She was now resting on her left side, preventing the injured ribs from holding her weight. The only noise in the room was her steady breathing.

Ben moved swiftly and silently through the doors of the hospital. While the entrance and waiting area was quite crowded, many casualties of the attack having been moved here now, many of the bodies simply moved out of his way as he made a bee line to the desk. Maybe it was the way he walked, as if on a mission that no one wanted any part of. Or the crispness of his perfectly tailored suit, giving him the added benefit of making him look younger and more fierce than he had in a while.

Or maybe it was his eyes. There was a cold, hard look in them that screamed for answers...or blood. Or both, his mind chimed in.

It had been over a week now since the attack. After his dance with Tess, and her necessary obligations taking her from him, he'd found no reason to stay at the ball. He'd been the only one at the set of fireplaces that early. Well, the only person on his own, at least. He'd returned to the dorm and went to sleep, exhausted by that little bit of exertion. He would have preferred to have Tess there, even just to lay next to him as they drifted off to sleep, but he understood.

He'd heard the next day about the attack. Many students and faculty were staying in the states, helping with the cleanup and care of the wounded. It was no surprise that Tess hadn't returned for their last day at the school. Ben packed and went home, hoping to hear from her soon.

More than a week...and nothing. Still, he hadn't worried. Not until Conner floo'd him with news from Rhian...

Reaching the front desk, Ben's hands splayed on the white counter as he leaned forward. "Holmes, Tess."

The healer behind the counter looked up at him, and her eyes widened. She was a young wisp of a thing, barely out of University. Her mouth moved open and closed a few times, obviously struggling with her words.

A crease forming at his brown, his eyes narrowed on the girl. "Tell me where she is this instant, or do I have to go tearing through every floor of this bloody hospital to find her?" His voice was deep and bordering on deadly. He had no qualms of following through with the threat, and proved this by turning on his heal and heading down the first hallway he saw.

Minute after excruciating minute, he searched every room. After what felt like ages, a soft touch on his arm had him turning swiftly, only to find the young healer standing there. "I...I'm sorry, but she's only suppose to have family...are you? Are you related, I mean."

Where his moved had been beginning to boarder on frantic, he seemed to switch into a different gear entirely. He was still just as keen, just as angry, but now the gleam in his eyes was almost predatory. His voice soft, he started advancing on the unsuspecting witch slowly, step by step.

"No. I am not related to her. But so help me, Merlin, I will not be kept away. I've gone through too much to be stopped now, and I won't be. So," the witch gasped as her back hit a wall. Ben knew the affect he was having on her as he saw her pulse racing at her neck. "are you going to tell me where she is, or do I have to make you?"

The girl swallowed thickly and whispered the room number. Up a few floors and all the way down, he finally found the ward for recovery. He stopped just outside the door, starring at the name on her closed file that was hung on the wooden barrier.

Calm down, Watson. You're no good to her like this. A pain bloomed in his chest so strongly that he had to brace himself against the door frame with both hands. He was afraid. For one of the first times in his life, he was deathly afraid. What would he find on the other side? Would she...

He couldn't take it any more. Softly, he opened the door, holding his breath. The room was dim, bathed in a soft glow. It was quiet, the only sound a soft breathing. Letting the door close on itself, Ben stood frozen to the spot, his heart in his throat.

'Ouch' Was the very first thought that Tess had since her last attempt at staying awake. She was getting better, she could tell from the fact that the pain wasn't as horrible as before. Her fever was gone, which she appreciated.

She never once thought that she would ever get hurt in battle, at silly as it seemed. She always thought that she would get a few scratches, but she wouldn't be as hurt as she had gotten in the last one. Pain was some fleeting feeling that in her case she rarely felt. Emotional pain was one thing, the dull sting, but a sting that no one saw and couldn't deter someone from pushing forward. Never would she ever compare it to the physical kind. For one thing, she never thought that a cough could make her start weeping over the pain, or that bright lights could render her hopeless.

When she was unconscious she feared the darkness, and at the moment the dim lights were her best friend. Her eyes had gotten used to the darkness, the only tell-tale sign of a difference came from the crease under the door that told her of the fact that it was definitely a big difference. She wanted to get out of here, to be in her bed, to just not be a burden on whatever poor healer had her on her rounds.

She wasn't the kindest when it came to being in pain. She had made the last healer cry when she had popped her bone back into place. Her tongue cut right through the woman's insecurities in a way that made her realize she would never see the redhead again. She had called out to apologize, but they had simply given her medicine to make her pass out once more.

Her thoughts were cut off when the door opened. She closed her eyes tighter as the light came in, and wondered what Healer she had today. She knew she was on medication, but she hated taking it, it made her head fuzzy and her tongue heavy.

"No more medication please" she whispered out, "I'm okay"

She wasn't okay, but she wanted to be alert, just try to have some normality. If her body couldn't stay sharp at her she cold try to be with her mind. She rolled over slowly, scared to hurt her side that was tightly bandaged. Her arms shook, but she desperately tried to hold her weight steadily as she moved back to position.

From the way that the person didn't speak, Tess looked towards the general direction of the door. There was a person in the room, that much was clear, but it wasn't a perfectly happy healer, or a talkative one she could surmise, especially from the lack of greeting and questions she was asked. Annoyed at the silence, she answered the questions she usually was asked.

"My head is okay" she called out, "pressure is fine, no worries on that. And I'm sleeping patterns are peachy, so please no more sleeping draught, I can practically feel myself getting bed sores if I stay in bed any longer."

She looks so small, he thought to himself. Ben couldn't pull his eyes off her form as she lay curled in on herself. Every fiber inside of him urged him to go to her. To sweep her into his arms and hold her close. To never let her out of his sight again.

But he stayed still as she stirred, watching as she moved slowly, pain flitting across her face. His heart thrummed loudly in his ears, waiting to see her reaction. Would she be happy? Would she yell at him for not coming sooner? He swallowed thickly, not letting his mind wander to darker, more dangerous possibilities. She's alive. She's safe.

Before he could move forward, she started talking. Her words were soft, and her voice was scratchy. Whether from the attack, or medication, Ben really didn't want to think about it. But by her words, talking about her symptoms and such, he could tell she thought he was someone else.

Trying to stay calm, he moved into the light. "I'd take you anywhere you wanted to go, but I think I'd get hexed to high heaven." His words were light, but his tone wasn't. It was a declaration. A promise. One that he'd follow through with, if she asked.

A few steps took him to her bedside. With her moving about, there was a small bit of space on one side of her that head could prop himself up on and not press into her at all. He couldn't see the extent of her wounds, but they were obviously there. One of his hands moved down to hers, the back of his fingers lightly brushing against hers.

"I.." Ben's words caught in his throat. "I'm sorry, I sh..." What could he say? That he should have been with her at the ball? That he should have been there to protect her? That he couldn't lose her? Not again. His head hung in shame as he couldn't meet her eyes. "Tess, I'm so sorry."

"I'd take you anywhere you wanted to go, but I think I'd get hexed to high heaven."

Tess looked up in surprise as she realized that it was not a Healer that had entered her room. She knew that her room was restricted to family only, that there were people guarding her door. From the newspaper she knew her name had been tossed around, only because or her surname and the weight it carried. The fact she was injured fighting in battle meant random journalist wanting to gain fame would try and enter, get a picture of her in her wrappings. Mycroft had made sure no one would enter.

It had also been the reason that Tess made the excuse for people that had not visited her. They couldn't visit her, it wasn't that they didn't want to. It seemed foolish to repeat it, but it made the room less lonely, less isolated. It was better than the room she was sharing with a dozen other patients, but certainly no picnic.

His words were what brought a relief, the fact that he had somehow made it through the guard to enter. It was silly really that she hadn't paid attention to him earlier. The height, his eyes shining in the dark, that reassured her it was him.

"It's such a shame you can't, I'm rather fond of breaking the rules" she called out softly.

The boldface lie, that much was clear. But for him, she'd do so many things, and that was frightening. She blinked back tears in relief to see that he wasn't just okay, but he hadn't forgotten her. And as he moved closer, she moved her feet away giving him more space. She wanted him closer, to hold her, and just make her feel safe. His apology was unexpected, and she frowned immediately at his tone. She wasn't dying, she was just fine, except for the broken ribs and her head pounding. Nothing she couldn't bounce back from. She let him play with her hand, and as soon as he finished she squeezed his hand.

"Did you read it on the papers? It's not as bad as they depict it, I promise" she said softly. "Just a few bruises here and there, nothing big" Liar "There is nothing to apologize, I knew there was a chance...I'm sorry you could have gotten hurt."

Ben loved Tess's spirit, especially now. In a way, he was glad she hadn't asked him to find a way to get her out. As much as he would love to hide her away from the rest of these idiots, he knew she was safest here. As much as he knew about potions, he knew how much he was lacking in the healing aspect of the field. He'd never had the need for it. Until now. There was something so disheartening about knowing you were of no use.

Her grip on his hand was comforting, in both her ability to do so and the strength behind it. In those initial moments, he was unsure about the state she would be in if she woke up.

He shook his head. "Not initially, no. Conner was the one who told me first." He'd been surprised by the contact from the Hufflepuff. The last few days, as he felt clearer than he had in months, he knew he'd been a bad friend to the boy. They were trying to fix that, looking for a place together, even. But when he'd heard about Tess...nothing else mattered.

Honestly, he didn't know if Tess was being honest or not. She was strong, he knew. But she was also hard headed, at times, and tried to put others before herself. Instead of pressing the matter, though, he let it slide.

Brow furrowing, his guilt didn't let up at all. "Still...I should have been with you. Maybe then..." He didn't really know. Maybe he could have saved her from all of this pain. Or he could have gotten both of them killed, for all he knew. But at least he would have been by her side through it all. That was what had scared him the most, really. That she would...die...alone.

Lifting her hand gingerly, he brushed his lips against her palm, not wanting to disturb the IV's on the back. He rest his cheek there, content to feel the warmth of her, even in such a small amount.

Tess hummed softly as he squeezed her hand so easily. She wanted him closer, to just take in his scent and have him touch more than her hand. Her cheeks reddened softly at the way her mind chastised her, but she never meant it in any way but a comforting one. She wanted him to touch her face, her hair to tell her she didn't look as horrible as she felt. Merlin, was her hair even okay? She lifted the hand he wasn't holding to try and fix herself. She wasn't usually vain, but she did pride herself in keeping up appearances, like any good pureblood girl.

She tugged her hair softly frowning at some curls framing her face in a way that told her a good comb and her shampoo would fix everything. She hated smelling like the hospital, with scentless soaps and shampoos. She didn't feel like herself, and it frustrated her.

The mention of Bailey was what froze her hand as it moved her bang from her right eye. She never was fond of the Hufflepuff, always so...so heroic, disgustingly so. The way he walked like a happy puppy behind Rhian. She'd seen them, so happy together, and it often times made her wonder how Rhian could fall for someone simple-minded.

"Why would he tell you? He hates me" she drawled out. "Did he tell it to you in some joke? Or did he tell you how Rhian didn't visit me..."

She'd seen the way he looked at her, with anger, disgust, thinking she was some ice queen the way she carried herself. She even had heard him talking about how obviously she wasn't affected by things like normal human beings. She knew she had hurt people that the Hufflepuff cared about, Rhian and Ben. But she would never explain herself, and neither would she be even listened to.

"Still...I should have been with you. Maybe then..."

"Maybe then you could have been hit by the explosion like I was?" She blurted out. "No, I was glad you weren't there, I would have...I would have cared more about you than other people..I would have lost my concentration. You're...Ben you're my weakness"

It was embarrassing to say, but it was true. She would have kept a look out for him, and would have lost her purpose in the battle. She was to keep order, help out, but she'd gotten hurt not by a Black Widow, but by some Gryffindor who couldn't control the Bombardia spell correctly. She remembered the distinct feeling of death.

She didn't want to say dying. But she wanted to know if he felt the same way she did. She had cried in what she thought were her last moments under rubble. She had been alone, scared and had given up on fighting. Her last memory was the woman committing suicide, she shivered at the thought. She didn't dare ask, it was too fresh of a wound, but she would soon. One day when they could both think about those moments and not feel pain.

When he kissed her hand she squeezed his hand softly and lifted her other hand to touch his face. He looked so handsome in his clothing. He was dressed if he was ready for business.

"I know it's dark, but that's not my mouth you know" she teased tiredly.

Ben watched as Tess started fussing about her hair. The concern was evident on her face and he almost wanted to laugh. His lips tugged up into a half smile as he let his free hand find hers in her hair.

"You're beautiful. Stop worrying." His thumb traced lightly down the side of her face in passing, still unsure of what he could touch. Really it was the unknown that he didn't like. She may say that her injuries weren't anything to worry about. But if so, then why was she still here? There had to be something to it, and so, until he knew what, he wasn't going to overstep.

He did let out a soft laugh at her words about Conner. The venom in his little doe's voice was apparent, and he loved it. Sure, Conner was the best friend he had, strange as that was. But he was not surprised that Tess didn't like him. From what he could tell, Conner didn't like her either. And that was perfectly fine for Ben. He felt no need to make them get along.

"He's a good enough friend to me, so don't be too harsh on him." A little was okay, though. "He's the only one that...well, that knew about us..." Ben didn't feel the need to elaborate. The boy didn't know about his drug use, but he'd known about the ups and down the the two Slytherin's relationship through the years. So he'd been kind enough to inform Ben of what he'd heard. Although it was clear that Tess was a little hurt that Rhian hadn't shown. "I'm sure she has her reasons," he added lightly.

Ben stayed quiet as Tess spoke words they both knew to be true. He would have been more harm than help to her, that night. Hell, he could barely stay standing near the end of his evening and he had only been there an hour. What use could he have been in a battle?

Moving past that with a small nod, his eyes widened at her last words. Her voice may sound tired, but it didn't temper the heat that flowed through his veins at the implication. Without answering, he remembered her saying that her head was fine. So at some point it wasn't. Noted.

He decided then, to say 'to hell with it'. His hands left hers, only to frame her face lightly in an attempt to avoid too much pain to her. Adjust his position slightly, he was able to lean over her small form easily, his lips reaching hers with now hesitation. He'd wanted to kiss her since he'd woken up in her arms on the floor that night. But beside light kisses along her hair and temple, he hadn't felt like he deserved to kiss her. But in light of her comment, he couldn't very well deny her. As the kiss continued, he felt a spark of heat deep inside him that hadn't been there in a while.

Tess flushed as he called her beautiful. Compliments thrown at her were rare, usually it involved her intellect or getting something done right, but never about her looks. And while yes, it was preferred over just looks sometimes...she just wanted to feel like a girl. She wanted to feel pretty and be admired for more than her potential qualities. It seemed silly, but raised in a society where looks and breeding mattered sometimes it was reassuring to hear it from someone as desirable as Ben.

"I can't help it, I don't feel like me here" she muttered softly.

She closed her eyes as his hand found her face in the dim lighting. She nuzzled his hand, letting herself admit that she missed his touches. It was a relief that the cuts on her face had healed, it had worried her at how her looks might have been affected. Looks meant everything, to a certain degree, at least when you wanted something in a man's wizarding world when being a woman. A flutter of lashes, a coy smile, got a girl far.

His laugh is what made her remember to live in the now, and not her insecurities. She liked his laugh, she hadn't heard it in a long time, and it was still something that brought a small smile on her face.

"He's a good enough friend to me, so don't be too harsh on him." A little was okay, though. "He's the only one that...well, that knew about us..."

Tess raised her brow, Bailey knew about them? No wonder that he disliked her, she only knew that he didn't appreciate her from the way she treated Ben. But now he knew how far things went? What they did behind her engagement? She blushed, horrified at how much that stupid Hufflepuff knew.

"I'll try..for your sake to be kinder" she muttered.

The way he spoke about Rhian made her look away. The thought that Rhian had a reason to stay away wasn't that hard to imagine. She had been a horrible friend to her, she easily snapped, forced her to choose a side, and threw her to the side once she chose wrongly. She sighed and shrugged.

After she blurted out the words, words that she most definitely meant, she blushed, but couldn't help but let a small smirk form at his expression. The shock, was so easily seen on his face, that she giggled softly. His hands moved slowly towards her cheeks and she let her lips part as he came closer. He was moving too slowly for her liking, and she licked her lips subconsciously in anticipation. As their lips touched, her hands moved slowly to his hair asking him not to pull away too quickly.

A soft sigh escaped her lips once they got comfortable. She missed him, she didn't know how much she missed intimacy until she had it. He tasted so familiar, like coming home. Her lips parted and took full advantage of the moment. She hadn't had that adrenaline rush since the attack, but the knowledge that she had lost all of this, lost him made her lose her propriety. She wanted to show him she missed him, she loved him even after everything. And she wanted to remind herself, why it was good that she didn't give up this, him, love.