It's Where My Demons Hide (Ben & Tess)(Warning: Drug Abuse)

How did I get here...

One minute he'd been crouched on the stone floor in the Room of Requirement, starring down at the burned flesh that had been the other boy, the next...he was in the Heads dorm. He hadn't even looked back for Eris, just simply stood and walked away. At least that's what it would have looked like...

In his mind, Ben was a mix of panic and absolute calm. He'd purposefully harmed another student, and let that part of him be shown in the process. He should care. He should be worried. But right now, it felt like his world was spiraling. Even now, he could only gasp in short breaths, knowing that a few of his ribs were cracked if not completely broken. And the blood from his cheek was running down his neck, onto his school uniform.

He needed to get away. To escape. Not just the physical pain, but the images that plagued his mind even now. Voices mixed together, telling him things he did not want to hear.

Moving slowly, his hand at his side, he climbed the stairs up to his own room. The door left open behind him, he fell to the floor in front of his trunk. He'd created an extended compartment in one of the sides. Perfect for hiding the potions he didn't want found. Opening it, he pulled out a few vials. So much movement jarred his ribs and he cried out, hissing through the heat.

HIS Tess... His mind just wouldn't let go.

One vial...

Why couldn't they just all leave him alone! He wanted nothing to do with any of them. They were just days away from leaving this place for good and he'd finally be free of those snakes.

Two...

Of those dark brown eyes...and her smile...and the roses... His eyelids drooped as he felt a different warmth, a familiar and welcome one, dripping into his veins. A soft smile played at his lips.

Three...

No more her...No more pain...No more...anything... He fell to the side, a grunt escaping as he landed hard on the most broken bone. It still hurt, but it was quickly numbing. Urged on by the success of the potions so far, he lifted the last one in his hands to his lips.

Four...

Tess tried to figure out what was going on in her life. It was a mixture of nothing and everything. When had her life just gone to pieces? When had her personal life become nothing but a constant taste of bitterness that no amount of brushing could remove? When had her heart given up on doing more than just beating? It all felt like she had wasted her time, her heart, her life. All she was now was a prime student, good grades, praises from teachers, that was what her life was, but at the end of the day, she was nothing. Pushing the door to the common room, she sighed and threw her backpack to the side, she didn't even bother to put it in her room. The room was suppose to be hers either way, at least until he could stomp in and throw himself on the couch.

Walking to her room, she was oblivious to the obvious shift in the area. Instead her shoes were removed, and the routine began. Hair tie off, her hair down, her tie tugged off as it hung loosely around her neck. And she began to unbutton her uniform. In the midst of her routine, something was off, and it all came with a thump, broken glass, then silence. Her brown eyes immediately drifted towards the door that prevented her from knowing anything more. Her blouse hung loosely around her as she pulled the door open and popped her head out. Nothing out of the usual, but something tugged at her core telling her to look for more answers. Her bare feet touched the cold wooden floor as she walked. All that protected her from the weather was the silk tank that covered her propriety.

"Anyone there?" she called out tentatively.

A part of her got annoyed at the fact that she was calling out to a seemingly empty room.

"Stupid" She muttered.

Before she went to slam the door closed once more, she noticed something out of the ordinary. The door across from hers was open, that never happened. When Benjamin was there the door was shut, when he was gone the door was shut as well. He was a man of routine, and something told her to go and check. Trying to fill her curiosity, she walked across the hallway, towards the door. Part of her wanted to know why things were out of order, the other part of her wanted to see how his room looked like. Whatever she had imaged in no way was close to the real picture.

Her eyes didn't even look around the room, for the moment her eyes caught the mop of black hair did her brain short circuit, and the room blurred around her. He was just there, no sign of life, no sign of anything. He was bleeding, his shirt barely there and looking so utterly broken. She couldn't even take in the information as her eyes began to fill with tears at what she had discovered. She ignored the broken glasses, instead immediately bending down the boy.

"Watson?" she called out softly, shaking his shoulder. "Watson this isn't funny! Get up" She shook him all the more, but he wouldn't budge. She rolled him over, and from her fingers softly trailed down his cheeks trying to get him to budge, yet scared to break him. "Benjamin? This isn't funny, come on, please? Ben? Ben!"

But no calling was enough for get a reply. She wanted a snide comment, some snark, even a grunt was enough for her to stop crying. The shaking wasn't waking him, and she had never in her life felt so utterly lost.

When Ben rode the high, it was usually calming. Soft colors. A warm ocean breeze. The sound of waves filling his mind and drowning out everything else. With fire at his core, those things shouldn't comfort him. But they did. They gave him a sense of home that he'd only ever felt when-

Someone was screaming. Off in the distance, long, drawn out screams in a low baritone. Who cares? his mind supplied.

That ocean was still there. The waves licking at his bare feet as he wandered its shore. But it started to raise, circling his legs, then his torso. Past his chest and over his head. He tried to move, to swim, to reach a surface. But there was none. Only water...a calm suffocation.

Images flashed before his eyes.

A girl sitting on a couch. Clutching at a book while the world passed her by...

Her body falling backwards off the cliff, hair lifting up to form a halo around her...

Tears in her eyes...for Merlin knows when...

Her soft skin in the pale moonlight. The red seeming to radiate against her paleness...

They flitted by, fast enough not to linger, but slow enough for him to feel their full weight. Words were poking through them. Bleeding in. His name. She was calling his name. He wanted to call back, but it would mean giving up his last breaths, as the water brushed across his mouth, begging for entrance.

"Come on, please." His eyes closed slowly, in that place, under the water. He'd go to her, if that's what she wanted. Because he always would. Come hell or high water, he'd go to her. A soft whisper in his mind muttered a sweet goodbye as he expelled his last breath. The water burned as it poured into him. Taking him. Killing him. Freeing him...


His body grew colder by the second, his blood slowing. His response to the drug was soft, not some thrashing gestures of a lunatic. But they were there, non the less. His fingers were the start, twitching erratically. It didn't take long for the rest of his body to follow. Just small movements. Foaming of some kind of substance fell from his parted lips, mixing with the blood on the left side of his face.

Just as his mind was giving in, his body was fighting on.

No matter how smart of a girl she was told she was, in no way prepared her for something like this. Tess never felt so helpless in her life, because in some cruel world she never thought she'd see Ben vulnerable, he was strong, broken, but always strong and despite the way he had broken her, she never wished this on him. On anyone. She slapped his cheek softly, hoping to get his response, her hand slid down to his chest, trying desperately to find a heartbeat. It was there, faint, and nothing that could calm the panic. He looked so hurt, and so many questions were jumping out. Her mind was screaming, ideas, panic, need to flee, need to stay, all these made her head swarm.

"Shut up" she hissed trying to find a solution, tugging her hair. "Concentrate"

Wiping her tears she tried to figure out what had happened. Her bare feet gave her a hint to what had happened. Looking down she noticed blood, her right foot bleeding from broken phials. She leaned down, never once letting go of him to lift the glass. She sniffed it something, her brain trying to find what it could possibly be.

Sleeping? No. The breathing was too labored, the smell was incorrect. Calming Draught? she licked it lightly No. Far too thick to be right. Focus!

The drops of light teal coloring was enough for her to guess it was the Draught of Peace, but something was off. The lighting was off, and from the look on his arms it wasn't normal. The veins began to form, and as he began to foam, she immediately rolled him over to prevent him from choking. Something in her told her to help him. Her hands frantically went to his mouth and shoved her fingers in his mouth, forcing him to throw up. She winced at the feel of what was happening and tried to lift up the heavier man.

"Oh Merlin! Benjamin stay with me!"

Seeing as nothing was working even after throwing up, she got up and began to frantically search his room for what could help with this situation. She couldn't brew, hell the way her hands shook she just wanted to do something to make all this go away. She ignored the way the glass cut on her as she moved through his mess. His clothes thrown to the side as she dug through his layers to find those phials. She let other phials drop of the same teal color around her, the smell permeating and around her.

"Please, oh please" she whispered to the air, as if someone would be able to help. If she ran off to find help it could be too late. If he was to die, she would want to be with him, hold his hand and love him for the last seconds he had on earth. Her eyes trailed to the trunk and practically threw herself over it, digging through the trunk. Opening it, she saw a whole chemic set, foreign crystals to one side and so many teal phials. Not even bothering to think it through, she searched to find a different shaped phial, the color different and clearly a set with the teal.

Tess lifted it and pulled the cork smelling it before simply shoving it down his throat. The word Narcan on the bottle, and it was foreign to her. She prayed to the skies and bent down, pulling him up, attempting to stop the shaking to have him just stay still and began to let the liquid slide down his throat, ignoring some droplets that fell out of his mouth.

"Ben, please" she whispered. She kissed his dirty forehead crying softly, her fingers in his hair as she held him lost in the world.

There had been a moment. One wonderful, silent, moment, when everything fell away. But then he was in the water again. And it was falling away. Rushing back out to see. And he was coughing up the water, tasting bile and copper, and salt. It was so real, even his throat burned from the expelling.

But after that, the wind picked back up, brushing lightly across his face. And her voice...it was there with him. Soft and beautiful, and everything he ever wanted.

"Ben, please....stay with me..."

Here she was his. Here no one else mattered. Here...she loved him. Before he could reply, a darkness closed in on him, muffling everything...


His eyes split open slowly, heavy with the pull to sleep. Pain erupted in his skull, answered by the burning in his throat and body. Everything felt to real not to by. But why was he here? Where was he? Why couldn't he just stay at the ocean, where life was easy and he had-

Eyes focusing now, he realized what the warmth holding him was. Recognized the familiar scent of her hair as her lips brushed his forehead. No...

"No..." his muffled please was barely audible. His body wanted to move, to run, to hide, but even a small attempt at movement hurt to much, as pain sliced his side. His eyes slid shut then, clenched as he tried to banish the truth. "No. Not you..."

The tastes he remembered were real, as he smelled the stench of vomit and familiar potions, and his mind tried to catch up. To piece it all together. It was slow though, and he was still confused.

"Why couldn't you just leave me there..." he whispered, not truly understanding. He wanted the sea, and the quiet, and the her that would love him and need him. Not the one who hated him with every part of her. He'd rather live with no Tess than that one.

Hot tears slid down her cheeks, Tess didn't dare open her eyes to see him fade away into oblivion in her arms. She had failed, she always had a fear of failing; something simple as an exam but never something as serious as failing him. She had settled for emptiness so long as he lived. But without him, without hating him, without loving him, it didn't mean a thing. Her heart hurt, never had a pain been so deep inside her until this very day. She clung to him tightly hoping to just go to a happier place.

"I'd rather have you in this world and not need me, than not having you at all" she whispered softly into his hair. She buried her face into his hair, ignoring the smell of blood on him, the smell of soot and the bile near them. She waited patiently, already feeling herself, her heart giving up. "Hate me, push me, just be here, please"

Never in her life did she sound so pathetic, and never in her life did she mean every word. She hated herself to realizing how the last words he would hear were that lie. Her last image of him the way he looked to hurt at the boldface lie that she had moved on.

"Moved on" she said aloud laughing as a hiccuped sob bubbled up, "There's no moving from you, you idiot."

Forcing herself to pull away she looked up a the ceiling, letting her tears fall as she tried desperately to control herself. She wondered if she could have done anything different.

"No..."

That soft rasp was what caught her attention. And she immediately looked down at the fragile man in her arms. She tried to smile, to show him some reassurance at the confused expression on his face. He was alive, and she took in a shaky breath happy to have him there, with her for this moment.

"No. Not you..."

His next words hurt her deeply. A dagger thrusted and slowly turned into her chest, selfishly she hoped he'd still want her around, at least happy she had saved him. But real life didn't work out that way.

"I'm sorry I'm not who you wanted, but at this moment all that matters is that you try and regain your senses" she whispered softly.

She lifted her hand, that wasn't dirty and wiped her cheeks removing the tears that were trailing to try and be logical. How could one immediately shift from desperate fear to control? She never was good at that.

"Why couldn't you just leave me there..."

Looking at him sharply, she managed to glare through her pain.

"Because you're too important"

She was bitter, he could tell in her voice. But Ben didn't care. This version of her didn't matter. The one who spit words of pure ice at him. Who'd gotten over him so easily, to traipse behind that Murray boy. To-

"Someone doesn't like to share"

A burning started behind his eyes and tears started forming slowly. What did he care? This Tess had taken everything from him. What more was a few tears?

"Please," his voice was raw from the bile, "just let me go back to her...please." His head was still swimming. Still putting together reality with what he'd dreamed.

He wasn't important. If he died now, what would it matter. The year was ending so they didn't need a Head Boy. His parents would get over it. Conner would find a new friend, if he hadn't already. Life would go on like normal without him.

So why was she crying?

"She..." he swallowed thickly "you...loved me there." It was more than he wanted to say. But maybe, just maybe, she'd be kind for once. Be kind, and let him leave. Let him have one last memory of the her that loved him before he met oblivion.

Tess closed her eyes tightly as she couldn't help but fight back tears, but it was useless. She was so stupid, so utterly stupid, because no matter what she did, she couldn't let this go. Hadn't she learned enough to not let him affect her? She knew he didn't love her, he'd shown it more than enough hadn't he?

'He almost died' her mind reminded her.

Her world was caving in, and she was being so utterly selfish. She didn't know what he was doing, why all of this even happened to begin with. But it wasn't her time to wallow in his rejection. It was time for her to be thankful that he was alive more than anything. They were both so damaged that it was utterly pathetic. Here they were, in the center of the room, broken glass around them, his clothes all around them, and him laying on her lap, his head near her bosom and her attempting to have some control.

"I'd rather have you in this world and not need me, than not having you at all"

Her own words repeated in her mind and she knew she had promised the universe this. And she would follow through. She leaned down and moved his hair form his eyes, trying to see how clear they were. Absentmindedly wiping the dirt from the blood, the bile and the potion on her silk tank. He was alright, he was getting better, and she would honor her promise.

"Please," his voice was raw from the bile, "just let me go back to her...please."

His words were so slurred, in her ears, so confusing and made no sense. She shook her head her eyes searching to see if she even solve the puzzle that he was. Her mind wondered what he meant? But as he avoided eye contact she knew that he was meaning his subconscious.

"You were dying" she rasped out.

It seemed that even in the chaos, their voices were nothing but a whisper, never trying to fill the void that came around them. He didn't get it, he didn't understand how important he was to her, to others. He...he was so important in this world, just seeing him reassured her that life was normal, even though it was pain just staring at him, longing but never accepting it. For pride. She sniffled a bit and shook her head.

"She..." he swallowed thickly "you...loved me there."

Those words made a burst of tears come out of her and hugged him close. He was so confused, that he didn't even hear her pleading, didn't hear her promises of a better tomorrow if he lived. Pride be damned, she wanted him alive and she was selfish enough to keep him so. He might not want to be there, but she got what she wanted in this situation and she would keep it going as long as she could.

"You stupid stupid man" she sobbed out as she clung to him tightly. "You're so stupid"

Dying. Oh...yes. That. It explained why he was happy for those few moments. Why she loved him again. Only in his mind, in the insanity of leaving this world, could she forgive him. Ben knew he should be worried that he almost died. But honestly? He wasn't.

Not when she was holding him like this. He'd always been so much bigger than her, but with the exhaustion of today's events, he was nothing but dead weight. And nothing matter outside of their small bubble as he looked up into her face.

Her eyes are just the same, he thought. The words she spoke didn't make sense to him, as she hugged him close to her body. At first he wanted to push her away. To tell her he didn't need her pity. But after a few quiet seconds, her cries muffled, he felt himself wrapping his arms around her. It was slow and halting, as his body fought back at every movement, but he just had to. Had to steal this moment for himself.

She was warm, and soft, yet her hold on him was grounding. He was so very tired, and wanted nothing more than to drift off again. But he'd miss this, and he just couldn't do that.

A sigh escaped him as his lips brushed against skin, it didn't matter where, just that it was her. "Merlin, I miss you." She'd chock it up to a drug addled rambling, so why not say what he wanted to. It wouldn't matter in the end. Nothing did.

Tess' shoulders shook as she clung to the man who use to hold her, the man who used to keep her safe and warm. Now the roles had reversed and she held him close, she pressed herself against him, her body remembering how natural it all seemed to simply have him around. This disaster somehow pushed all her resentment away, at least for the moment, because the betrayal, the pain that he gave her at his infidelity didn't matter. All that matted was him. Could she tell him out loud that she loved him? No, not yet. Her heart was too raw. All she wanted was to hold him and care for him, mend him and then if he chose to leave her she'd be okay.

She was okay with being alone, if that's what he wanted. It was this moment that she realized that she was tied to him. It was useless to even think she could love anyone else, even thought it was too early to think about love? Wasn't the best kind of love insane anyways? Their history told her it was enough to believe it, no matter how scary it could be. She inhaled his scent, and took in the smoke, her mind immediately going to the fire. She was scared of asking, scared of really know what caused all of this.

"Merlin, I miss you."

That phrase is what killed her. She clung harder, only allowing herself to pull away to kiss his forehead. She did miss him too, even though they were a room apart, it meant nothing if she couldn't hold him like she did now. How many nights had she thought over what could have been?

"You can't even imagine how much I need you" she whispered softly closing her eyes.

It wasn't past tense, it was reality and in her raw emotions, her heart spoke. It spoke despite her bruised ego, her stubbornness, to admit her need of him.

Need. Ben used to think he knew what that meant. That it was a simple concept, one used every day, by ordinary people. Now, though...it meant pain, and yearning. And a hole in his chest that he couldn't fill, no matter how hard he tried. Oh, and he tried. But nothing had worked. Not even ruining himself even more...

Feeling the ghost of her kiss still lingering on his skin, it felt like it was seeping into his very bones. Warming him in a way he hadn't felt in over a year. He pulled back slightly, wanting to just look at her. It'd been so long since they were this close, he hadn't notice the small changes in her appearance. They were small, most people wouldn't even notice. But he saw. He would always see her.

Still not sure if this was part of the dream or not, one of his hands reached up, his fingers still shaking. He wiped at the tear stains on her face, awed by the ability to do this again. To touch her. His body tried to relax then, but something in his side rubbed the wrong way, slicing pain jolting his whole body.

"Ahh! Damn..." he clenched his jaw, hissing through the pain. His groan morphed into a dark hint of a laugh. "Guess this isn't a dream. Go figure."

Looking up into Tess's eyes, Ben couldn't help but wonder why he'd ever let her go.

The silence was comforting; he was the one person that she could feel comfortable being quiet to in a private atmosphere. She wasn't a talker, usually she was on the receiving end of gabbing, but with him it brought comfort and it let her think. Thinking was an action that she overexerted many times in her day. Never once did she let herself just take action impulsively, it frightened her to do so, frightened of what foolish thing she could do. At this very moment, she was trying to get it together, trying to desperately get her brain to understand that he was alive and everything would be okay.

'He's alive, he's alive and he still cares for you'

Would her life continue out after his death? Yes, her life would had continued; but in a empty shell of a way that she had done before. She had let so many people out of her life go, and in the end, hate was her way to cope. It wasn't her anymore, she no longer smiled genuinely, she no longer allowed herself to daydream, to write, to notice the things around her. It was rather one distraction to another, and she knew it was her way of coping without people. But he wasn't just any person, he was the person for her. All or nothing. She was always committed to everything, it shouldn't have surprised her that her heart was the same way.

As he shifted in her arms, her brain shut off and she opened her eyes staring at him curiously. Wondering what move he would make, and how would he react to her holding him so close now that it seemed he was gaining his reflexes. She forced herself not to show pity as his shaky hand reached towards her cheek. And as he wiped her tears, she seemed to break a bit, letting a few more run down her cheeks. Even in this moment he was trying to comfort her, the idiot.

"Ahh! Damn..."

That was what caught her attention and she looked around to notice the mess around her, and really let her see the extent of his bruises.

"Guess this isn't a dream. Go figure."

She shook her head at his words and instead pulled away, forcing herself to take action. She couldn't just let herself fall here, and not take into account the things around her. Looking at his bed she wondered if she could pull him towards the bed without falling over, or him getting even more hurt. Her wand was in her room.

"Wait here" she muttered and forced herself to not touch him once more as she ran towards her side of the room. She winced as she felt her left foot burn lightly at the cut, sure enough, there was a cut on the side. She reached her room, grabbing not only her wand but essentials she could have used.

Picking up the balms, creams, phials in the emergency kit she always had. Slipping on shoes, she ran back with what was needed. Clearing a spot she put everything down and walked back to him.

"I'm going to move you to the bed, try to stay still" she murmured before using the spell and getting him to the bed. As soon as he laid down she went to his drawers and picked out another shirt for him and lifted her brow. She had never seen him shirtless, and it seemed today would be the awkward time. Walking over to him, she sat at the edge of the bed shyly.

"Do you mind if I-" she made a movement of his shirt not able to finish her sentence, "I need to check the bruises and cuts you have"

Ben's eyes were clamped shut as he tried to focus on even, shallow breaths. In. Out. In. Out. He heard Tess say something, but couldn't really respond as his stomach turned and he wondered if he would be sick. As the memories from earlier that day came flooding back, he felt like he wasn't really part of it. Like he'd been another observer in the room. Feeling the loss of warmth around him, he bit back a cry at being laid back down onto the wood floor.

It seemed like forever until Tess returned, though it was just a few minutes. The direct pain was abating a bit, if he didn't move, but he still let his eyes stay closed, content to just lay there and not hurt for a moment. He felt her return to his side before she spoke.

You can do this. Don't be a wimp. But he wasn't feeling very strong at all. And the last thing he needed right now was for Tess to think he was some simpering idiot. Nodding his head in consent, he felt her magic curling around his body like a soft caress. He felt weightless as he was lifted off the floor and hovered over to the bed.

Everything was fine until it let go of him and his body was allowed to sink into the sheets. Where the floor had been hard wood, it hadn't given at all. His bed was not so easy. The soft contours seemed to shape to his body in a way to create optimum discomfort. Brow knit, he barely registered that Tess was speaking again.

Moments after she spoke, her words finally clicked in his head. Damn. He didn't care that she'd see him half dressed, there was nothing special about that on his end. Though...the thought did send a thrill through his spine. It was the look of pity and disappointment the he knew would follow.

"Sure. Go ahead." He wished she would just charm it away. If he was honest, he wasn't sure his stomach could survive another jolt of that level of pain so soon.

Once she got consent, she moved closet, struggling to be as detached as possible. This wasn't the time for her to lose her concentration by some fluttering in her stomach. It was time for her to heal, as best she can, after all she knew he would fight her if she dragged him to the hospital wing. Slowly she removed the shreds of clothing left on him and looked at his chest. He was pale, but she noticed just how skinny he had gotten. A frown etched on her face as she slid her hands softly down his sides wondering how she had never noticed.

'Could it be pride? Denial? her brain sneered.

She was ashamed for not noticing, and she was angry at him for doing such a thing to his body. But at the end of the day, all she cared about was that he get better. She opened the balms, and dipped her fingers, and began to work through the cuts. Her fingers slowly began to cover the marks that thankfully would not scar, rubbing lightly, not enough to sting, but to let the balm work it's power. Her brow furrowed as she moved down, slowly taking in the damage as a whole. It was a work of art, a story told through his injuries, one that told her this was no accident. From the bruising that would form, she could tell it was a fight. Finishing the wrappings on his chest, she crawled over taking the other side of the bed and began to work on his cheek that seemed cut.

"Ben...what happened?" she asked softly, once she was done.

She didn't move away, instead she grabbed his hand softly as best of a comfort as she could give him. She wanted him to tell her, as best he could, and she would be there for him, even if she wanted to deny it.

Ben felt the material fall away from his body. It wasn't that the shirt was it terrible shambles, but there were scorch marks and a few tears from fumbling around with Murray. The air was cold against his skin and he tried to move as little as possible. Avoiding as much pain by breathing in short inhales. His eyes had been closed as Tess worked and it wasn't until he felt a warmth at his sides that he let his lids open slowly, needing to see her by his side.

The pity and disapproval were easy to read in her features. But she hadn't cared before. No one had. So what had been the point of taking care of himself when the only thing that mattered to him was work?

As Tess worked through his injuries, Ben tried to relax. He really did. But her touch was distracting in a rather irritating way. Yes, he wanted her, as much of her as he could have, but he knew she was his weakness. And right now he was weak enough. Feeling her hands, rubbing the salves into his skin, brought back memories that he'd been fighting for over a year now. They all came rushing back and he couldn't help the pinprick behind his eyes. Clenching them shut, he refused to give in.

It wasn't until she was finishing up, the tingling healing magic running over Ben's cheek, that she started asking the inevitable questions.

Ben swallowed, knowing that honesty was the best plan here. Maybe...not all of the truth though. "I...It probably doesn't surprise you that I'm not Head Boy based on popularity." A small smirk tugged at the side of his mouth without the cut.

Sighing, he let his eyes focus on the ceiling. "Murray showed up when I..." Was off my rocker...was about to kill Eris...was ready to break down... "wasn't really...me. It didn't go well."

"I...It probably doesn't surprise you that I'm not Head Boy based on popularity."

Tess smiled softly at his attempt of a joke. It was by no means a real joke, but it was..it did really fit to them. Neither of them were popular, at least on in her opinion. He was gorgeous, and she had seen how many girls, and some boys turned to look at him. He was so tall and intimidating, yet had an allure that just made her wonder how he never had a girlfriend. Well....someone better than Eris...and her.

As for herself, she didn't consider herself to be too special let alone popular. She wasn't tall, or overly athletic. She couldn't be too fit, it would go against what her mother viewed as a lady. She was also awkward, never really in her six years at Hogwarts able to find friends. Well friends that stayed at least.  But she managed to be able to have some politeness.

"I don't think either of us would win a popularity contest" she whispered back a shy smile on her face.

But something in him shifted as he tried to remember what happened. She could see his eyes glaze over for a moment, as he was replaying it or something. She bit her lip and waited, never once letting go of his hand, instead playing with the tips of his fingers.

"Murray showed up when I..." Was off my rocker...was about to kill Eris...was ready to break down... "wasn't really...me. It didn't go well."

Murray..she tensed up immediately at the mention of Josh. Just what happened? And was Josh okay? She knew that Ben didn't exactly have the best opinion of Josh, what with the ex-engagement of theirs and such. But never was he outwardly aggressive about it. But then again it would never be about her. She shook her head at it.

"What do you mean it didn't go well?" she asked softly, "What did you do? Was he the one that hurt you?"

She frowned and ran her fingers lightly against the wrappings. Wondering if her friend's injuries were any close to the damage that Ben had gotten.

As Benjamin began to talk, she slowly began to take in what he said. While it didn't seem clear exactly what started everything, it was enough for her to know that he was regretful for what he did, and she wouldn't hold it against him. Once the medication began to hit his senses, he rolled to face her, and she had no objection to curling her body towards him and fell asleep. It was a long night, and she needed to make sure that he was there, safe and on the road to recovery.